'04 to '09

Jeremiah 29:11 says, ‘For I know the plans I have for you,’ declares the Lord, ‘plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future’.

When I was in church today this verse spoke to me during worship session. It struck me like a lightning and I was practically in tears (u know, guys would always hold back their tears, but this time some managed to escape from my eyes). God truly had a plan for my life. As I ponder over the events that had happened in 2009, I began to see God’s hands upon my life. Things that I assumed were to go wrong in my way, became right in the end. It was like divine intervention in everything that I did. Studies, relationship, family and all. It was hell of a struggle to juggle all these at one go but somehow I managed to do it by God’s grace. Without God, I not have been who I am today. His blessings upon my life were countless. Starting from the beginning of my life till now, I am still being blessed.
My recent graduation was a classic example of God’s grace in my life. Without God, I would not have gone overseas for my studies. Back in 2004, I applied for all sorts of scholarships to further my studies and sadly none of them bore any fruit EXCEPT for my current programme. Well, I was awarded this scholarship and the challenge began. In fact, finding for guarantors for my scholarship was the first of the few hurdles in my study. It was not easy for someone to guarantee you your study but by God’s grace, two of my church members helped me out. Without them, I would have had so much trouble in finding for 2 guarantors, not 1! Thanks Uncle Voon and Uncle Edmond! Without the both of you, I would not be what I am today! Well, that was settled, and the class challenge began! I was elected as the leader of a class of 24 students and the best surprise of all was that 23 of the students in the class were Malays and 1 was the only non-Malay! Gosh, that was too much of a surprise as I did not have a companion like my other friends! Great! I was like oh no…….. I am so DEAD! But to my surprise, God's hands were upon me and well, I could truly say that being the leader of the class was really great! My classmates were cooperative and we learned to respect and help each other which I thought was really good!!!!
Then when we were placed into different universities during our first year of degree, the struggle starts again. This time was the seriousness of my studies. Things were more complicated this time and at times, I really broke down and cried. My family was the my strength and rock during these times. They were really supportive of me and were backing me up in everything I did! You see, without God’s perfect plan, I would not have such a great family! Without God, I would not have seen daylight at the end of my studies!
During my second year of study, this time in Wellington, during my first church service in Wellington, I did actually cried as I was so touched by God. Not really by the sermon but by the fact that His grace has brought me all the way to Wellington. Without His blessings I wouldn’t have been there. It was all these small little things that really made me realize that life is too short to miss anything. I want to catch everything that God has for my life!
Third year was pretty much like year two but with some extra problems. Well, instead of talking about the problems, let’s see what the problems have taught me. First of all, it taught me to be patient. I notice that I get agitated easily whenever I dislike something. Not that I am all good now, but I did really learn to overlook some things that happened and I think I am more patient nowadays. Secondly, they taught me to be independent. Well, I can honestly say that I am very independent since secondary school days but this third year of degree truly taught me to be more independent so much so that I learn to rely on myself when it comes to task completion. Not really as in independent from God, but independent from friends… Why? There were problems which I faced in my friendship with others which made it difficult for me to trust others anymore. Okay…. Third year is not all about bad things…. It was also full of wonderful memories when I met my loved one….. She was truly God-sent as she was, is and will always be supportive of me……. We spent countless hours together…. Laughing, joking, doing crazy things and going for holidays… Gosh… I really miss those days…. Throughout the whole year, I think I flew to see her so many times that I lost count of them…. Whenever there were cheap flight tickets on sale, I bet you, my name will definitely be there! What can I say! This is also God’s blessing for granting me job to sustain my expenses!
Well, for the fourth and final year, I was back in Malaysia. Looking back it was a year of toil and sweat! So much of struggles, so much of problems and yet so much of blessings from God! Studies had to be one of them! There were so many struggles to complete all the assignments at hand! Imagine, having to complete and submit a group assignment the Monday after the holiday! Gosh, definitely not a wise thing to do, especially for a group task! I wouldn’t call it a holiday then! That was just one of the problems with the course…..
Since the beginning of my degree year, I have always wanted to graduate in the university which I studied in… I certainly do not want a mere celebration of graduation in IPBA which is not as grand compared to the graduation in Wellington. So I planned…. Initially everything worked out well but towards the end, we were told that our course will be stretched on till 16th of December 2009 and this date clashes with my graduation date which means I would not be able to graduate in Wellington this year… I was devastated! When I heard that news, I thought to myself everything is over…. No more graduation…. However, with God’s intervention and blessing, our programme was cut short due to a shortage of funds to run our programme which means that we will be having our holidays earlier than 16th of December 2009! Not saying that it was a good thing but for me to graduate? Wow! I thought to myself! God made a miracle! The impossible is now possible! All things are possible with God! So I got on with my planning for the trip of my lifetime and guess what, my whole family and I had a wonderful time bonding together as one! We had fun travelling around New Zealand…. To cap it all up, it was a trip of a lifetime for my mum as well because she thought that she will never be able to go overseas anymore after the studies in Scotland! Well, well, well… what else could this be…. Definitely God’s blessing!
So, that was a short summary of my degree years till I finally graduated on the 16th of December 2009! There are more challenges ahead of me as I prepare myself for my chosen career… and I truly believe that God has a plan for me! He has put me into this, and He will definitely see me through this! True enough, He sent Jeremiah 29:11 to me in church today!!! Hallelujah!!

An Experience to Remember.........

Christina

Suhafna

Christina, Puteri & Jessica

Mages

Sibyl

4SB

4KB

Last Friday, 2 October 2009, was my last day in SMK (P) Sri Aman. Gosh, it was such a bad day…. Not a bad day as in a negative bad day, but a bad day as in I had to leave my students. Well, I would dare say that I am very attached to my students. This just reminds me of how quick time passes. 12 weeks ago, I was just starting to get my grip being a teacher and now, I am missing my students by the days! I truly wish that I can be in that school permanently and serve my school and my students. Throughout the whole 12 weeks, both classes were gems! They have been such tremendous blessings to me. In fact when I was given Form 4KB, everyone, even the UM trainees, told me, ‘Good luck with that class’, ‘Have fun’ and ‘That class is a problem’; that was what I was told before I even set my feet into the class. MY first impression was like ‘OMG’. Things began to play in my mind and I even wondered about my capability of controlling a naughty class….

On my first day in 4KB, the girls were superbly well-mannered! I thought to myself ‘Aiks, this ain’t so bad’…. True enough, I did not have much problems with 4KB. They have been so good and obedient. Even till the last day of my practicum, they were like hi Mr. J and all…. I heart just dropped thinking about them… I really had a whale of time teaching that class… There were so many moments of laughter. One which I could not forget was ‘Confidence is sexy’. When one of my students mentioned that, everyone in the class burst out laughing, including me! In that class, laughter was not the only thing we had. There were also moments where things got serious. Through it all, we managed to go through the entire think and thin together as teacher and students. As for 4SB, I could still remember the first lesson in which I made a blunder and fool out of myself. I was like… erm… sorry… this is my first time teaching you all… so… a little bit nervous…. When I said that, my students were so sweet… they said, ‘it’s ok teacher’. I was like, gosh, these girls….. I expected them to burst out laughing at me for the blunder that I made but it turned out that they were very supportive in what was doing. Thanks girls!

One of the valuable things which I learned throughout my entire practicum stint was that in order for one to be effective and respected, one has to be humble. I did it, and I enjoyed it! I always believed that even though teachers have all the power in the classroom, there isn’t a need for teachers to show that they are high and mighty to the students. My principle was to put myself down to the students’ level, work with them and understand them. These students are at the age where they are neither here nor there and as such, they need proper guidance and support from the people around them. What I learned from my own doing was that being on the same level as the students, I can see the way they look at thing, the way they work and also feel the way they feel. Once this is done, they will begin to appreciate us, teachers, more and even respect and remember us for life. (Well, I hope they do). Sometimes all we need is just to show some love, affection and respect towards the students. We need to show that we care for them. That’s just about it, love, care, respect and attention. Simple.

Working with the staff in Sri Aman has also taught me a lot of things! To be able to work with the English panel of that school was just an awesome experience! The teachers were very supportive, fun and sporting. They made my life in Sri Aman an memorable one! Personally, I felt that these teachers are truly passionate about their job! They were ever willing to share their experiences and time with us, trainees, which were priceless. All the teasing, joke and laughter will definitely be something that I remember the most. These people were just awesome! Sibyl, Suhafna, Puteri, Christina, and Mages (sorry for naming all of you without salutation), thank you for everything that you have done! I truly cherish all the time that we spent together. It has been a pleasure working with all of you. You taught me not only about career life but also about life in general. Not sure about you all, but for me, I see all of you not only as my teachers and mentors but also friends in which I can rely on. To sum it all, you all ROCK!!!!

In conclusion, my time in Sri Aman has definitely been a fruitful one. There were so many things which I have learned and that will carry me through my lifetime. I have not only found passion for my career but also friendship that I will never forget. As for my students, I will always remember all of you! I couldn't have done it without all of you! Remember, whenever anyone of you need any help, just feel free to buzz me on Facebook, MSN or drop me a text! I will be glad to be of help whenever and wherever I can. From me : ‘Once a teacher, always a teacher’. I LOVE YOU ALL!!! TAKE CARE AND MAY GOD BLESS ALL OF YOU ABUNDANTLY!!! HUGS AND KISSES!!! (can't do that in school)... haha! :-)

Gosh.... Please have mercy.. Why twice?

Twice! not once but twice! My lesson for one of my classes was a total disaster. Every single thing just seems to go wrong! Yesterday, the LCD failed me and today..... OMG, my speakers failed me! I am so so frustrated with the day! With the speakers failing me, I had no choice but to sing! OMG! OMG!!! I was totally going to faint..... My voice sucks and my students were giggling when i started singing! Some did cheer me up, thanks for the support girls, but some couldn't help giggling! I didn't mind them giggling at me because I truly know my voice sucks! Well, that's just the beginning of the lesson....... Following that, the temperature in the class was rising rapidly! It so so so hot in there as the students were not supposed to switch on the air conditioner. A computer room without air conditioner? Gosh.... it was boiling hot.... i sweated so much that my students even realized that..... I went through the lesson briefly as is realized that my students were not paying much attention towards the lesson.... Sorry girls... i tried...... I am sorry i failed.... Instead of dwelling much into the lesson, I talked about life, making decisions, just like in the poem in the lesson.... well, I hope some listening...... Thanks for those who supported me and encouraged me...... thanks again girls... in the end, I decided that this lesson has to be done all over again.... and well, I guess that's how it would be..... In the future, I will very likely choose to do my lessons outdoors... fresher air and better ventilation........ so sad... not once, but twice!!!

School... School...Skool...!!!

Life is indeed difficult...... Waking up early day after day since 29 June 2009 was an uphill task (Miley Cyrus 'The Climb' playing in the background)..... Every single day seems to be soooooo long that even when the bell ring to signal the end of the day is often a sign of relief.... Well, that was before, now things have been better and lovelier.... Getting to know my students is such a wonderful thing in my life. By just teaching them makes my life more fun and more interesting. Helping them with their work seems to give me a lot of satisfaction...... Even better, to see them understand a topic is even more than a mre satisfaction... It has always been my philosophy that being a teacher in school is not only being a teacher but also a friend and cousellor to the students. This is because a teacher is a person who teaches but a friend is a friend who teaches, helps and share lives together (ermmmmm... share lives as in good rapport....). The two classes that i was assigned were two of the most wonderful class that 1 could ever ask for... (well, i was given 3 classes if the 1 that was taken away is counted)..... the students were very good.... behaviour wise, knowledge wise, and everything..... a sense of good patential can be seen in them through every single aspect. For me, they are the future..... having them in my class is just wonderful..... it's true.... wonderful wonderful students...... Now, going to school seems to be an anticipation to me....looking forward to school everyday.... A wonderful day that is.... (though some days are a dread).... Seeing my student in school makes me happy and they truly makes life more interesting and lovely for me! Thank you! Gotta go... will post again soon....hopefully.....

A Night View of KL.....

My Mum's Lily....